Die Hard is one of my favorite movies of all time. Next to Terms of Endearment, Fried Green Tomatoes and Steel Magnolias, of course. I like movies with believable protagonists, who are tough as nails but whose humanity and vulnerability are so authentic, you almost forget it's the specific time of the month where you just want to sit around and watch these type of movies while crying, eating chocolate and dealing with bloat.
Don't get me wrong...Bruce Willis wouldn't have lasted 2 seconds trapped in Truvy's Beauty Shop, nor would he DARE screw around with Debra Winger's medication. But all of the people in these movies are resilient and creative. In short, they kick major heinie while wearing rumpled clothes and a tired smile.
Just like me.
Excuse me, but did you just snort with derision? Don't do that...your face might freeze and it's NOT very ladylike.
Let me just let you people in on a little secret...I would rather run over glass barefoot while spitting on Sally Fields than have to face ditching yet another project that I ruined, right as I was finishing it up. That stress alone is such that I find myself muttering random things like "There's no WAY Crystal Effects look like a snow globe" or "You can't possibly put a *&%$* card together, video yourself doing it AND blog about it...EVERY DAY." over and over.
I'm a freaking HERO, I tell you. Rumpled clothes and all.
Think this crafting thing isn't stressful? Imagine how I felt when I found that people actually use SEWING MACHINES to stitch cards and I couldn't even thread one...much less sew a straight line!!
Do you know what it's like, trying to follow folding patterns for lever cards or trying to tie beautiful ribbons- or thread them through delicate diecuts when God has burdened you with fat fingers and man-hands?
Or how about charging different orders to different credit cards to hide your addiction, or explaining to your husband why you had to go out and buy a Hallmark card instead of making one because you're too busy trying to complete Vendor challenges and going to cardmaking school?
To H-E-double hockey sticks with Bruce Willis, sadistic Germans and Olympia Dukakis; I GOT your stress RIGHT HERE-next to my overflowing stamp drawer, 42 thousand rolls of ribbon and a box empty ink pads with retired colors I can't refill but can't bring myself to throw away.
So BITE ME, Willis!
Outer Design: MFT Cowgirl at heart, both image and sentiment
Various Designer, Kraft and self-adhesive cork
SU! Basic Black and Image stamped in StazOn Brown